Telling it like it is - Tuesday edition

Like I need a reason to tell it "like it is," but I thought that I needed a little comic relief!

I was talking to my daughter, and she mentioned to me out of the blue, that her therapist has an "evil eye" <---I am sure she has no freaking idea what that means, but then she proceeded to mock her and say "sooooo tell me how you feel about that??" In this hilarious voice! I could not help but laugh...dont you hate when that happens??I told her that it is not always wise to say things that you might be thinking out loud. She replied by saying, "but you lie when you say someone looks skinny in a dress and they look fat," WTF? I have NO idea where she got that from, but then I had to go into this looooong explanation of how sometimes you keep from saying what you really think in order to spare feelings.

Ok, I know you are starting to read bla bla bla, so im gonna get to it. This edition of Telling it "like it is" Tuesday by sharing some of the things your kids say and how we reply vs. what we really would like to say. PLEASE feel free to add!

Comment - "Mom, do I have to go to school today?"

Reponse- "Of course you do and it will be fun! Just think about all the awesome things you will get to do and before you know it, it's the weekend!"

What you would like to say - "Urgh! I know what you mean, the teachers at your school are annoying the shit out of me! I can see why you would not want to go to school and do the same crap everyday. I personally would love for you to stay home so I don't have to take you and I can sleep in!"

Comment - "Mommy, Sarah didn't invite me to her party."

Response - "Well, that's okay. I am sure she meant to, but even if she didn't you should be the better person and just ignore it. Don't let it get to you."

What you want to say- "That little bitch! Who the f_ck does she think she is? Urgh! You don't want to go to her cheap ass party anyway, right?"

Comment - "Ben slapped me in the face for no reason today, and I told the teacher, and she didn't listen!"

Response - "Calm down now and lets talk about what may have happened. What part did you play? Maybe I will contact your teacher and see what exactly happened and hopefully we can get Ben to apologize.

What you want to say - "Why didn't you slap his little ass back? Have I taught you nothing? Oh the teacher didnt pay attention to you? Well, tomorrow I am going to have a nice chat with that lady and she is going to listen!

Comment - "Why do you get to stay up late and I don't?"

Reponse- "Well little kids require more sleep than adults in order to grow healthy and strong."

What you want to say- "Because this is my house and I pay the bills, so I run things. When you are older with your own kids, feel free to stay up all freaking night! Until then, get your ass to bed!"