The 411

This is my random life. The good, the bad, and the ugly. There is no real purpose other then to share. So glad to have you on board for the ride, got your seat belt on??!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The guest blogger you wish you were!

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My Questions for Jaime over at Moma Propaganda!

1.) If you had to describe your parenting style in one word, what would it be?

 Answer – Go with the flow. Technically that’s four words, but who’s counting? Okay, if it had to be one word then I would say my parenting style would be described as “whatever”. Don’t get me wrong, my kids wear clothes and wash their hands and I get them to bed by 8:30 most of the time, but I really try not to sweat about the little things. When my daughter was born, I tried so hard to do the sleep training thing, didn’t let her have juice or sweets, lost my mind when she refused to nap, yaddah, yaddah, yaddah. Lets just say I was not a happy mommy. This time around with my son, I’ve learned that those things, while important, are not to be obsessed about. To say that I’m totally relaxed and carefree would be so utterly inaccurate. Lets just say that for the sake of my own sanity, I try my best to let the little things go and focus on the big picture, whatever that means.

2.) What is something that you would like more people to know about you?

 Answer – I can make breakfast for my daughter, while brewing coffee, with my son perched on my hip, while talking to my mom on speakerphone, and watch the morning news as I plan what I’m going to make for dinner. But I guess that’s nothing special since all mothers are super multi-taskers.

3.) Do you think "mean people suck?"

 Answer – Lets pretend I’m not a mean person – “Yes mean people suck!”

4.) What do you feel about competition between mommy blogs?

 Answer – Frankly I find it a bit intimidating. There are so many talented writers out there, and with a new blog being created every second the competition is fierce. My unsolicited advice – when you’re feeling down in the dumps, like your blog sucks and no one except your husband is reading it and only because you make him, don’t go to Dooce.comfor inspiration. She’ll just make you feel like giving up because she’s so fabulous. Go to some lesser blog (like Mamaganda)to boost your ego.

5.) If you had to pick a song that best described your family, what song would it be and why?

 Answer – Billionaire by Travis McCoy – oh wait, that’s my theme song.
 Answer (take 2) – Skinnamarink-a-dinky-doo – It doesn’t quite make sense, but it’s sweet and cute and makes you feel loved.

REFORMED MEAN GIRL by Jaime from Moma Propaganda

by boetter’s – Flickr

I was inspired by Dee's question - "Do mean people suck?"

It made me remember all the way back to the third grade when cliques and mean girls were just starting to come on to the scene. It was the 80’s and I was proud to be rockin' a new denim skirt my mom bought me when a mean girl inevitably rained on my parade - "Don't you know that denim skirts are out?" Frustrated and hurt, I had no witty quip to fire back. I went home that day and thought up mean things I could do to get back at her. I guess that's how I first learned how to be mean.

Grade school is a blur to me, but a few instances of meanness stand out. I remember the brothers with the bad body odor and the girl who fell carrying a pitcher off juice in front of the entire cafeteria.

Then there are the instances where I was the mean girl. The times I iced out the weakest link from our little posse for being lame, or the time I teased a girl relentlessly for being so skinny she looked like a stick ("stick girl" was pretty mean in the third grade). Now she’s probably effortlessly slim while I continue my epic struggle to lose 10 pounds.

I'm ashamed that I wasn't a stronger person. Being mean is easy. Doing the right thing never is. What really bothers me is knowing that the people I was mean to remember me. To them I will always be the mean girl just like how I will never forget the mean girl who teased my beloved denim skirt.

My daughter will be starting preschool in the fall. These days, mean girls have infiltrated even preschool. "You can't play with us" or "You’re weird" may seem like benign child's play, but that is how mean girls are made.

Twenty years later I've come full circle. I pray my little girl has the confidence to stand up for herself and others. I have a sinking feeling though that in a few months, she'll come home with sad eyes asking "Mommy, why doesn’t Sophie want to be my friend?" Or worse, she may come home saying "Mommy, I don't want to invite Eleanor to my birthday party because she's weird."

Kids are mean. It's a part of growing up, learning compassion, and learning right from wrong. It's the people who are still mean as adults who really have problems. They are the true losers.

- Jamie from Mamaganda

Thank you Dee for the opportunity to share my thoughts with your readers. You have been a gracious host in a sometimes hostile, overcrowded blogging world.

6 comments:

  1. Thanks for commenting Jennifer!!

    Dee

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  2. It breaks my heart when I hear about cliques in pre-school - it seems like it's worse for girls, but I see it a bit with my boys too. I think you're right that the best we can do for them is to give them confidence - to choose to walk away, to know it's better to be on your own for a bit than to have mean friends!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Did you ever look into joining "The Secret is in the Sauce"? There are some really nice SAHM that blog at that site. Loved your post. Thanks for sharing. I'm a new follower!

    Anne-Marie

    ReplyDelete
  4. You know, I'm a girl and I have a daughter so I never even thought about mean boys! My son is only seven months old and such a sweetie. i can't even imagine him getting into a little tussle over a boy who calls him a whimp. My poor little guy. Oh the pain of growing up.

    ReplyDelete

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