The 411

This is my random life. The good, the bad, and the ugly. There is no real purpose other then to share. So glad to have you on board for the ride, got your seat belt on??!

Monday, July 26, 2010

Is following for a follow really following?

Picture borrowed from:

FIRST- Thank you to everyone who took the time to check out my blog and follow it, actually thanks to anyone who actually reads regularly or when they are bored at work and have nothing better to do. Hey, I'll take it! haha!

I have been on the fence lately about participating in these "follow me" posts that it seems many are doing to gain that a word? I have done a few myself and have found some great blogs by it, but after a while, I started feeling straight up dirty for it. (don't you roll your eyes at me girl!"

Here is what I mean, "I am your like newest follower, like follow me back too okay?" Its kinda embarassingly juvenile. Sorry. No, actually you know that I'm not. Stop acting offended, I have lots of blogista friends who participate in these regularly, and it doent make me stalk them any less, its just the way I see it.

I have to ask myself what is more important? Having lots of "followers" or having real people who actually choose to read and appreciate my blog? I know, break out the Kumbaya and hand holding right?! Biotches!

Of course, naturally when I made the decision to slow down on the "Following on Steroids" I noticed a dramatic halt of new followers. Depressing as it is, at least now I am truley excited when I get a new followers. Why? I know that they found Free2bMommy somehow and decided to follow regardless of whether or not, I would follow them. I know, I know, if I dont like them, dont participate, right? Well, I dont want to say that either, because maybe one day when Im feeling downy dumps and start to think my blog needs validation or I need an ego boost, I may decide to jump back on board.

I just don't want people to follow me, because they feel that they have to. WTF is that about? I have seen however some pretty awesome posts that are sort of like these "Freakazoid Follow Posts," only there are no "rules" and it is just a chance to get out into the blog community and check out new blogs and meet new bloggers. <---this makes sense.

So once again, I have torn up and questioned a truly popular practice among "Mommy Blogs," but someone had to say it right? As Danielle from the Real Housewives of NJ put it, "Someones got to be the villain, and I am okay with it being me."


  1. I was thinking this same thing earlier, get out of my head. This is why I do the follow thing...

    1. the bigger number a blog has the more chance your gonna stop to read , just to see what it is everyone else likes.

    2. When I do the follow, I RARELY go out and follow people I let them come to me. I look at it as a way to "get them on my page" so I can suck them in. Once they get there, the people that "get me" will stay and become regular followers

    To me it's like marketing in a

    I hate comments that say follow me back, they dont read the post , just say follow me. Dont tell me what to do

    Sorry for the long story like I said I was thinkin of this

  2. Agreed! Hahaha. I struggle with this all the time. I want followers but then again I don't want phony ones who are just taking up room on my "followers" list. Ah, idk. It's all so confusing to me. I think I just don't care anymore.

    I know a girl with over 500+ followers but she really talks about NADA! So I'm like, what are these chicas following really? LOL, I just don't get it.

  3. When I started blogging about 3 months ago, I was thrilled to find blog hops! It was a great way to get my blog out in the world, and gain recognition right off the bat. Now, I've tried to cut down on them, maybe only doing them two days a week (is that a lot? *shifty eyes*)

    I have to agree with crisc23, though; when I do them, I let people come to me, not the other way around. And I don't follow every blog back that follows me...I only do if I like their blog and the content. And I figure that if people are at least clicking on the link to see my blog, I don't really care if they follow or not! If my blog is memorable enough, they will be back *enter evil laugh here*

    Cheap Geeks Anonymous

  4. I will tell someone I am now following but I do not ask them to follow back. If someone isn't into my blog, they aren't into it.

  5. @Crissy- you are my sister from another mother!! hahaha!! You are right though, from a PR/traffic perspective it does make sense.

    @Alby- I have had that exact experience...going to a blog that has tons of followers and then seeing nothing of interest much less regular posts from the blogger!

    @Flufferwuffer- I too was really excited to find them when I first started my blog, I guess there really are many reasons why blogger participate.

    Thank you all for sharing!! I appreciate the honesty opinions!


  6. I hear you - I try not to follow someone unless I actually intend to go back and read more posts. Like yours :).

  7. i was just thinking the exact same thing earlier. I agree with every thing everyone has said before me. I actually think I found your blog through a blog hop but I come back because I like your writing style!

  8. I am really glad that I am not out on a limb alone with this one!

    @Keli- ya know what? I really appreciate your comment! Thanks!

  9. Ok, so this is hysterical...

    I JUST finished going through the list of blogs that I was 'following' and deleted a bunch!

    I participated in a few blog hops just to get my blog out there, but I really don't follow many...mostly family & friends...and a few *cool* chicks that I've met (online) along the way....that's how I found your blog.

    I will ony follow blog that I find interesting and ones that I WILL read.

    I really don't care about the number of followers that my blog has if NO ONE reads it...kind like 'what's the point?'

    Anyway...I follow you b/c you are totally like me!

  10. I will say I do follow back a large number of the blogs that follow me..


    I don't have the time no memory to remember who's who and visit everyone.

    I let them post a few times, after a couple post, you are gonna know if you want to read/be friends w/ them.

    If you do not fit what I'm lookin for you get hid from my feed, it don't delete it just hides them, like on FB when u don't wanna read shit from someone.

    So I'm livin up to my end of the bargain w/ the follow linkups they still have me as a number for their followers, I just don't read them or see them. You can always un-hide them if you wanted to read also

    see when u comment people's shit u get could tips =)

  11. I started a follow on my blog because I'm a "Green" blog and I love finding new green blogs. At work I spend hours reading blogs because my job is extremely boring most of the time. I spent hours Googling and trying other means to find Green blogs with little luck so I started the linky and voila! There they were!

    Then I decided to try to follow other kinds of blogs so last week I joined some other Follow linkys. The result was I found a lot of blogs I will never again visit. I'm just not interested in Mommy blogs really because, well, I'm not one. I like your blog because of your sarcasm and straight forward-ness but in general, I find no interest in Mommy blogs.

    So, I don't think I'll do that again, but I love my Green linky because I actually do read green blogs for hours on end every day. Otherwise, I totally get what you're saying!

  12. @Kristen- Yay! I have ball reading your blogs and checking out pics of your a non psycho stalker creepy way! haha!

    @ecofriendly and frugal- That makes a lot of sense. Sometimes when you search for different blog topics all you get is the "most visited" blogs and you never even see all the other awesome blogs out there related to that topic. I actually really enjoy the linking up, its the "follow me, I follow you" ones with rules to participate that get under my skin. Thanks for sharing and its nice to know that my blog is recognized for more then just "mommy content."

  13. @Crissy- Girl you have tons of followers because you freaking rock! If you can make it work for you, thats bad ass. I need to find the linkys that just promote other blogs as oppose to being for "following" only. <---if that makes sense!

  14. I lost a follower today, must have been a dumbass that adds the facebook fan

    There are a few like that , give me a minute and I'll let you know. There's no obligation, it dont say if you link up follow back or anything


    The rules:

    Grab the button above
    Add your link to the list below
    Visit as many other blogs as you can
    Follow the ones you like (and comment on their blog to say that you are following)

  16. haha! That is hilarious! Sorry, that you lost a follower, but do you really want a loser like that to follow you anyway! hahaha!!

    Thanks for the link, im heading over there now!



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